Power Source

I have a confession to make, though it probably won’t surprise those closest to me:

I've not been on program 100%...sometimes not even 50%.

However, I plugged back in this morning, and God blessed me immediately.

I got down on my knees and asked him to be bigger in my life than my disease...something I've done in the past but not recently. While I was praying, a friend's recommendation, that I read the book of Ephesians in the Bible, popped into my mind. I said half-jokingly to God, “I'll bet that means my morning devotion is in Ephesians, right?”

And it was!!

Not only that but it was verses about how awesomely huge and limitless is God's love for his people. I cried with joy. He was PRESENT...in the very room with me. His response was soooo immediate and to the point. As He has promised.

I know that and yet I don't. I'm learning that if I'm not willing to get on me knees, my disease is in control. And then I won't feel God's presence, power, and love around and in me.

All it took to set things right was one simple step on my part.

ONE!

And WHAM the connection is back.

I feel joyful and hopeful, clean and pure today. With His powerful love to strengthen me, I can do this program. Only then will a life outside of food addiction is possible. A life worth every knee bend, every effort to plug into my Power Source.

Keeping Track

I've decided to start tracking my mood and sleep hours daily. Why? I'm a visual person. Seeing is often more revealing to me. Plus I think I need the focus.

I was chatting with a friend who is also very visually oriented. She showed me her notebook where she tracks mood and sleep as well as her nutrition and make notes of events that affect any of these. She began to see correlations and trends she'd been unaware of before.

I think this will be very helpful for me. I'll at least give it to the end of the year.

Adventures in Kittenhood

I keep calling our new kitten Mimi after her predecessor Gigi. Not just the similarities of name, but the same issues of getting her incorporated into the life of my household, meaning me and 16-year-old Mr. Lucky Cat. Perhaps he and I are more indolent and less flexible than I believe us to be. All that kitten frenzy and curiosity annoys us, and we do not enjoy being toys, especially when the player comes with tiny but effective needle sharp teeth and claws. I’m covered with scratches toe to head from being the local climbing post and practice dummy for hunting and battling. Lucky is very vocal about his objections to her attentions. I don’t understand cat language, but his tone is enough to know he’s beyond cantankerous old man to contemplating reducing the number of her lives.

I try to remember she has a brain only the size of a walnut. A hard one at that! Think how many times a crow has to drop a walnut plucked from a tree before it cracks. Not that I’m dropping Mimi from any heights…other than mine… Reminds me that Bill Cosby once joked about childhood brain damage.

Here’s the kitten version:
Becca: Mimi, don’t play with Lucky’s tail. You’re gonna get swatted.
Mimi: (continues to eye the forbidden tail twitching just beyond me, wiggles down into a crouch, and pounces)
Lucky: YEE-OWWWL! (flattens her with one paw)
Mimi: Mew! (dashes for cover behind me again)
Becca: Didn’t I tell you not to do that?
Mimi: Mew. (I take that as “uh-huh”)
Becca: Then why can’t you leave him alone? He’s an old grouch.
Mimi: Me-ew. (Sounds like “I dunno” to me)
Lucky: RRRwwrlll! (jumps up and heads for the door…with Mimi right behind)

Fortunately, Lucky hasn’t used his substantially larger claws on her. But then, although born in March, he’s not a Pisces. I am. According a particularly wacky horror-scope, Pisces tend to torture small animals. That's an exaggeration of course. I would never harm one. I confess I do tend to pat cats on the head repeatedly, but is it dribbling if the head doesn’t hit the floor? I also have to confess a childish desire to watch cats jump straight up in the air. They have to be surprised to do that of course. A sudden movement underneath them with a loud noise often works.

I’m also a proponent of letting cats experience the consequences of their curiosity. Just the other day, I let Mimi explore the bathtub drain hole after my shower and let the shower valve drop on its own. It wasn’t a dangerous amount of water coming from the faucet. It didn’t all douse her head, and I did dry her off after I stopped laughing.

Then there was last night when I was in bed…I suffer some allergies and had the sniffles. Mimi was curious about the tissue waving in front of my face and the strange snort coming from it. I really couldn’t help the violent sneeze that blasted out just as she sniffed it. I’ll admit her instantaneous reverse leap from my chest to my knees tickled my funny bone. Reduced me quickly to my huffy Muttley laugh, complete with tears, even as I tried to comfort her. Usually my sneezes come in threes…I wonder if the laughter short-circuited that reflex? Hmmm…well, with Mimi’s habit of repeating herself, I guess I’ll have opportunity to find out.

I hope you could tell my tongue is firmly in cheek. Tell me some of your kitten or cat adventures.